Sometimes you owe so much to someone
That you can never pay them back.
The best you can do
Is dedicate your life to them.
And even then,
You only scratch the surface of your gratitude to them.
I’m sorry that our friendship had to end the way it did.
I’m sorry for everything I did, everything I said that ever hurt you.
I’m sorry that the depths of depression we both explored,
Were undeniably sourced in our relationship with one another.
I’m sorry that I have to be so harsh, so firm,
When I tell you that things must never become that way again.
I’m sorry that you are having a hard time understanding
That my hurtful actions
Aren’t meant for the sake of hurting,
But for our eventual, mutual, spiritual healing.
I’m sorry that my recovery is coming along swifter than yours.
But I’m not sorry.
I’m grateful to God for the grace and healing He has given to me
As a loving gift from Father to Daughter.
I accept His gift with songs of thankfulness and love.
No, I’m not sorry for accepting His grace.
He offered it to me – HE did.
Do you expect me to refuse Him? The Holy of Holies?
The one who died for me?
The one who loves me?
I AM sorry
That you have not yet fully healed.
I’m sorry that it brings you pain
To see me start to be happy again.
It does raise the question
‘Have you ever really loved me.’
Love is putting someone else first,
Caring more about THEIR welfare than your own…
The fact that you tried today
To make me feel guilty
For finding some happiness…
Love? Is that love?
By definition, it is not.
I’m sorry that you are still in such pain.
I pray for you daily,
Admittedly, some days more than others,
But your recovery
Is always a cause close to my heart.
I pray for your redemption.
I pray that you’ll find joy in God,
I pray that you’ll find joy in all of these things again.
I pray that you can forgive me for saying goodbye,
And I pray that you can forgive me
For being happy.
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me;
You will stretch forth Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, And Your right hand will save me.
The LORD will accomplish what concerns me;
Your loving kindness, O LORD, is everlasting;
Do not forsake the works of Your hands.
English Standard Version (ESV)
28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
I’m pretty sure – and correct me if I’m wrong – that even though we all “know” we’re going to die, we don’t really believe we will… You know?
We can’t quite wrap our heads around it. Whether or not you believe in any kind of life after death, don’t you kind of think – in the back of your head – that you aren’t going to be the one who dies… It’s always someone else… Only that’s what that “someone else” thought too…
I believe that we can’t bring ourselves to truly accept death because I believe we weren’t created to die.
Just a thought.
“I understand you’re worried.
This doesn’t feel the same.
But I won’t give up
I’ll try my best
To see, to see, to see…
I don’t want to be sorry;
I don’t want to give in;
I just want to remember what it was like